Currylingus

I can't resist dishing the following goss: uberslagmodel Naomi Campbell has been spotted vacationing in Stockholm with a Dubiyan prince. So says Page Six (via The Superficial), dunno how much I trust the 666 but what a strange pairing if it indeed is true. There is no clarification as to the term 'prince' so let me attempt to narrow it down for you. Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid used to be the Crown Prince and is now the ruler so he may not be our man...too high profile of a stunt for someone in his position. Sheikh Mo has three brothers: Sheikhs Maktoum, Hamdan, and Ahmed. Maktoum, the eldest, just passed and Ahmed (the youngest) is the army's Lieutenant General and also not so hot. Hamdan is the deputy ruler of Dubai and I am giving him the benefit of doubt because he seems to be a real honest, hardworking philantrophist sort...plus he's close to 60.

Now, Sheikh Mo has 7 sons ranging from early teens to early twenties and they are all-rounders, I mean Willy and Harry have nothing on sons born of Maktoum lineage today. These kids are not only well educated, well traveled, amazing at polo and rich beyond comparison but they are heirs to a gold mine...real heirs to a piece of the most profitable section of an oil-rich country, not figureheads. So, who could possibly have poked Ms. Campbell in the bedroom of The Grand Hotel with a royal appendage? The first possibility is Mo's second son who is probably in his early twenties, Prince Hamdan Bin Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum:



This man is being groomed for public life by his father and declaring him the new Crown Prince of Dubai would come to me as no surprise (has this already happened? I'm only speculating...). Look at him. He is a young, rich dish that is ripe for cougar season. The second possibility is Prince Hamdan's great uncle, Sheikh Ahmed Bin Saeed Al Maktoum, head of the Department of Civil Aviation and CEO of Emirates Airlines who is probably around 47 years old:



Look at him. He is an older, richer dish. He's never going to be head honcho so he can get away with a bit of canoodling. The man has been rumored to have a half-Italian love child somewhere so by my loosy goosy logic it follows that there is a definite chance he likes to slap model trunkjunk. What? People, this is not a research paper.

Those are my two suspects and this entire exercise is a waste of time because we will never know...or will we?

What are you doing this Friday? Drop it. Keep in mind the following words when thinking about your made plans: Just 'cause you pour syrup on something doesn't make it pancakes! D.R.T. has better things in store for you.

Riverside, motherfuckers.

I woke up this morning not feeling too shabby about the Conservative minority mostly because I had fully resigned myself to such a case about a week ago. This election campaign was by far the most exciting I have ever witnessed in this country. I had the wicked shakes while watching the CBC coverage last night, my riding (Trinity-Spadina) had an unbelievably close race with a positive ending as far as I'm concerned. Some thoughts on the Libs getting torn a new one...

2004's election gave us a Liberal minority that saw some very very desperate times and culminated with a savage re-election campaign this year. They tried everything to claw themselves to the top but ended up making the Conservatives look like sweet little bunny rabbits. Poor work. The new Tory minority government seems low on desperation and high on hope. A minority is just peachy for a party that has had severe problems with image and with unity among its own ranks. Still, Stephen Harper won because Paul Martin lost.

Ah-Hi-Five, Parkdale! See ya, Bulte (Liberal), we knew yee only too well. Many cheers for the voters, Micheal Geist, all the bloggers and journos who spread the word, and of course for Peggy Nash, the new NDP MP. You GO girl!

I can't believe Ignatieff (Liberal) snuck through by 4990 votes. Good thing he has some tough skin for all that heckling he's going to suffer. My distaste for his shifty appointment (and crazy ass views and evident arrogance) has been sweetened because it is one less riding for the Conservatives and let's be honest...the man is a dreamboat.

Olivia Chow (NDP) finally won in my riding with 3667 votes over incumbent Tony "Thug Life" Ianno. I was initially going Green but the race was very close and I'm glad I put my say in for Chow, I hope she serves us well in da House. I think she will provide a progressive voice in the new parliament, all she has to do is utter a peep and she will have done more than Ianno (Canada's laziest MP).

Overall the NDP did make great gains even if they fell short of holding the balance of power by one seat. This happening for the second election in a row must be a terribly disappointing feeling but they won't be left out in the cold when it comes to all the steamy policial action. The NDP and Liberal seats combined number higher than the Conservative seats...that's got to count for something.

The Conservatives did not manage to get a single seat in all of Toronto (23 ridings) but scored two seats in the Greater Toronto 905 area with Tony Clement and Jim Flaherty. Why are these two still around and still winning? They fucked things up for Ontario under Mike Harris and now they are Harper's 'in' when it comes to Toronto.

The Accountability Act will be dealt with first, then the budget. The defence spending, capital gains tax, transit credits will be haggled out with all parties invovled later in the year. Harper would be smart to work with all the parties perhaps shutting out the Bloc because I bet he's been wanting to try that shit out for ages. He needs to keep the Social Conservatives in check. This means no same-sex marriage votes and no letting people flap on about reproductive rights, especially all them cowboy Art Hangers. Should be interesting to see which opposition party will provide the Tories with the support they need to survive (NDP?).

Surprised to hear that Paul Martin has stepped down as leader of the Liberal party, poor guy. He has had a rough session. I would not have guessed these exit circumstances for a man who played more than a fair part in strengthening our economy to current levels. Such is this dirty game of ups and downs, au revoir M. Martin, hope to see you on the CBC during the next election perhaps. The race is on for leadership, I'm going with Frank McKenna (current ambassador to the U.S.) but others like the once-thwarted Martin Cauchon or John Manley or Michael Ignatieff or Belinda Stronach are sure to want a shot.

"You know what, you can never lose when you follow your heart." Thanks, Belinda. You know what, you will never have my vote with that coming out of your mouth.

Harper needs to stop wearing Cleopatra eyeliner effective immediately. And the dusty rose lips? Come on.

Incapable of making a straight decision...this is my kind of country...ladies and gents I present to you Prime Minister Stephen Harper...

One evening Seera and I decided to set up some group fun. See, we had been hunting raccoons all evening in the urban jungle and the ending score was Raccoon : 347, Seera & Neha : 0. This made us feel unmanly, we realized we needed something else to help us realize our full potential, something other than Scientology. As a result, we have decided to cut off our mullets, wipe off the magic marker pentagrams on our bodies, bursh our teeth, and dedicate ourselves to the fine art of Drunken Photography. Please, do join us on our quest this Saturday (21st). Email me (currylingus@gmail.com) for details about location and time. Rest assured, the place we have in mind has large telephone lines, a hill for tumbling, and barren wintriness galore. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE TO PROTECT US FROM THE RACCOONS WHO KNOW OUR FACES AND HAVE A RACCOON FATWAH ON OUR HEADS.



UPDATE

Ok, you PETA freaks leave your goddamn clothes on because instead of beginning Saturday's session by polishing our sling shots we have decided to meet for breakfast. Breakfast in a pint glass...Just kidding! Seera and myself will be at the Pour House Pub on 182 Dupont Ave. at 11 am. I will be having two eggs scrambled, buttered brown toast, and taters while Seera might go for something similar but with bacon or sausage or she might just surprise all of us and go for a poutine, at which point I too will want a poutine. Our final destination is within walking distance so once everyone has arrived we will begin our trek. See you there!!!

The BEST Christmas present EVER. Thank yee, Seera Truckit/Bobby Jo, your fingers are so nimble and crafty. Let's start a sweatshop!

The special handmade & homemade Currylingus zippy, chuddies, and jammies came packed with their very own slogan (a marketing maven, that Truckitt!):

Business in the front...



Party in the back.



FUCK YEA! I LOVE YOU, TRUCKS!

I cannae see a thing anymore!!!!!



That is all.

Two Sundays ago I watched Woh Kaun Thi ('Who Was She') on Omni 2. My mum used to sing and hum the tunes from this flick constantly, Lag Ja Gale ('Hug My Neck, Yo!') being a favourite of both of ours. The soundtrack to this film imprinted itself on my brain at a very young age and so I was delighted to finally get a chance to watch it. Perfect Sunday afternoon fare. Here is a short clip of the main tune, Naina Barse ('Eyes Are Raining', ha!):



Made in 1964 this murder mystery/thriller, which was loosely based on Hitchcock's 'Vertigo', is full of delicious frames due to excellent camera work. I'll forgive the fact that the highly unbelievable story just rambles in the middle and has a weak ending because I am a HUGE fan of Sadhana and Helen and of course, Mr. India...err, I mean Bharat, himself, Manoj Kumar. These three paired with Raj Khosla (director) and the smashing duo of Lata Mangeshkar (playback) and Madan Mohan (music producer) made me want to rant about the 'good old days' of Indian Cinema. Before Bolly this & that and decades before my birth. I'm turning into my father.

There was something other than nostalgia that was rekindled that Sunday. A desire in me, as old as me, a need to acquire...THE SADHANA CUT. Oh. My. Bollygod. Much to my mother's dismay I have always wanted the Sadhana Cut. This was THE hairstyle of the 60s in India. Every hair dresser I have ever attempted to cajole into giving me this cut has outright refused and one (in Porbandar) actually fooled me into thinking I was getting one until the very end when I said, "So, now can you cut my bangs please? What? Oh. You're NOT cutting my bangs? I see. It's a 'special Sadhana cut'? Ah." Behold! The Sadhana Cut:



Hmmm, I feel like I've seen that hair elsewhere...Oh yeah, her caucasian (but just as white) twin had the same hair:



Ah, Bolly Bolly Bolly, at least back then you would choose your *inspiration* tastefully.

This election suddenly became WAY more exciting and shameless compared to the last one. Many of you may be as in awe as I am of Liberal MP Sarmite 'Sam' Bulte (Parkdale Massive!) and the controversy around her shi-shi-poo-poo campaign fundraiser at the Drake. Touted as a potential Minister of Canadian Heritage, Sammy began taking a sudden interest in copyright reform once the bills started flowing in from the entertainment industry. Funny thing is that they never spent a dime on any other MP, just Sams, just because she danced to their tune. And she ain't playin with no broke broke either. That being said, if you (the reader) in anyway feel that the shaping of copyright law in Canada absolutely has to be placed in the hands of objective individuals who tend to take initiative from doing public good rather than private success then give thought to supporting the Copyright Pledge.

This petition has been proposed by Michael Geist, Professor of Law at University of Ottawa and blogger extrordinaire. His posts on this whole situation have been my sustenance for the past few days, very insightful and balanced. I also love the fact that he's gotten under Bulte's skin, at the Parkdale-High Park candidates meeting Bulte was asked if she was in favor of the Copyright Pledge (NDP & Conservative = yes) and she replied (in part), "I will not allow Michael Geist and his pro-user zealots, and Electronic Frontier Foundation members to intimidate me into silencing my voice." Geist's response on his blog pretty much sums up how I feel about Smarmite and "her" "views". Reacting to a request to advocate fairness in policy-making by calling people names just makes her look even more like a puppet with an absent-at-the-time master.

I don't support mass-scale online exchange of copyrighted items for commercial gain while ignoring the rights holders BUT if I want to give you the tune I heard today because it's deserves the publicity then I will do so...FOR FREE. And yes, that makes it all okay in my holy book.

As if they didn't have enough on their plate already, the Liberals are just racking up the minus points and I for one don't appreciate having to consider a Conservative majority. Do the right thing, Parkdale *vote NDP*.

I can't believe that THIS:



Is now THIS:



Bet those boots have wicked heels that would put Mizz Sarah J. Parker's to SHAME.

OMG, lists were so hot in 2005! You know what else was hot?

10. Annie - Anniemal
Yeah, I know this came out in 2004 but I only heard it in 05, plus it was released in Dubai only last year. Actually, I first heard 'The Greatest Hit' off this album in Dubai last summer...on afternoon radio at that. Soooo, I guess it counts! I've been waiting for pop like this since I got bored of St. Etienne and Kylie became overplayed. Annie has saved me with her chewing gum and down-to-earth lyrics about boys, clubs, crushes, and Top of the Pops. Missus B Missus E Missus A-U-T Missus I Missus F-U-L!

9. Modeselektor - Hello Mom
Ack, ze Germans are coming! People, I don't give a fuck if you roll your eyes at my next words...this album puts 85% of the crunk and grime and ghettotech out today TO SHAME. This is the sort of shit that I bet my life DJ Assault is slapping booty to. You know why? Uff, the man has taste. Tracks that take M.I.A. into warp speed, tracks that revive O.D.B., tracks with TTC, tracks with Arab strings, tracks that make you want to dance but you would have no idea how to so you just sit and listen in amazement to two sweet BPitch Control lads giving the slapdown of a lifetime to mind-numbingly austere techno-lords everywhere. Take THAT Kompakt.

8. Kelley Polar - Love Songs of the Hanging Gardens
Haayyy, it's time for the disco drums! *doo doo DOO* Haaayyy, lemme hear dem strings! That was my first reaction to this debut effort by a child prodigy who is so badass that he got expelled from Julliard. And good too because now we have this "unrequited love in my head and party in my bed" record. We also have his efforts on some of Metro Area's *bestest* tunes like Miura and Caught Up.

7. Boards of Canada - The Campfire Headbase
Ahhh, like putting on an old pair of jeans with frayed edges and cute, square front pockets, bought at Miss Selfridge in the hot summer of 99, in Middlessex, London, that have been there through sickness and health, summer and winter, Asia and North America, love and loss, and now they fit like a pair of loosy goosy pyjamas. Yoose dig?

6. Depeche Mode - Playing the Angel
HeLLO. Need I type anymore? From heroin to martyrdom, DM make the trek that few with their history can survive, heads high.

5. Roots Manuva - Awfully Deep
While the current hip-hop scene stanks hard of recycled beats and rhythms this album is all melody and chords. Taking elements from Duran Duran, Depeche Mode, P Funk, Basic Channel, crunk, Kraftwerk and his own dubby style, Rootsy has created a beast of synth that works oh-so-well with his beautiful voice and writing that's chock full of common sense.

4. Ada - Blondie
My past is speckled with crushes on Euro ladies who have killer debuts and like to sing their own tunes. 2004 was Miss Kitten, the year before was Ellen Allien, 06 is all about Annie. Ada was last year's obsession. Hard woman to find any information on...like where she lives and what she's wearing RIGHT NOW. All I know is how good this first album is and how it needs far more recognition in North America. Heartbreaking vocals in a sweet little accent and synths spanning house, pop, electro-tech, whatever. Special lyrics for one track written by one of my favourite bands of all time, Everything But The Girl. A couple of crazy covers of the Eurhythmics and Yeah Yeah Yeahs. This album is also an open floozy for remixes and has spawned good ones by Sacha Funke and Michael Mayer.

3. Isolee - We Are Monster
Metro Area and Boards of Canada met in high school and fell in love. They got married in a chapel (similar to the one in GnR's 'November Rain' video) and bought a cute house. A child was born who they named Isolee. He was a happy child leading a comfortable existance until he hit puberty. Things began to suffocate him. He began feeling embarrassed about his parents taste in music. "This disco, this slow melodious shit is for stuffy old people with no lives!". He was going to make his own music, something that suited him, he would show his parents something they had never thought was possible...and they would hate it...mwahaha. Many months later, he proudly presented his parents with the finished product. They just sat back, laughed and gave him a big round of applause. Isolee was confused (and a little disappointed), "I thought you were going to hate it, I mean, I made it the way I thought music should be made. I don't understand!" Metro Area and Boards of Canada looked at each other and said to him, "It may be your music but you are our son". The moral of the story is...this is a brilliant album. I love it & I love it. Guess what? I love it. Every bleep, bloop, twang, and lyric is so perfectly placed in this album that it MUST have a divine creator.

2. Danger Doom - The Mouse and the Mask
The most scrumptious collaboration since Paul & Michael. MF Doom and Danger Mouse, live together in perfect harmony, side by side on my player, this album, oh lawd, why don't we? Doom being his usual brilliant self and Danger just killing me with his samples. Throw in some Cee-lo, Ghostface, Talib Kweli, and a harmonium in the 3rd track to boot and this girl begins to feel unfairly over-rewarded for not doing the right thing and buying this slice of brilliance.

1. M.I.A. - Arular
Love at first goddamn Galang, that's what happened with Maya and me. Then came Diplo and he just made her sweeter. Bucky done good. I may have retired this hard-workingconstant from contant rotation a while ago but I still hear the tracks when I go out and I still don't roll my eyes and say "yesterday's news". I just DANCE.

ESPESHYULL MENTIONS

DJ Rupture - Special Gunpowder
The only reason this isn't up in the list is because I JUST heard it a couple of weeks ago and I think it was released in 04. This album is phenomenal and I expect much goodness from him in the next year. The first track will make you wine and grind the first piece of person/furniture/pet in sight.

Vitalic - OK Cowboy
Just for the heck of it, even though the pre-released material on this album kinda bummed me out (entirely my fault for having listed to it WAY TOO MUCH) I have nothing but love for these dudes. At the end of the day, this I can surely say about 'Ok Cowboy', AT LEAST IT ISN'T 'HUMAN AFTER ALL'.

And we'll be right back after these messages
Fellas grab your nutsacs, chicks squeeze your breastesses

Christmas weekend turned into New Years and now I am up to my elbows in work. Usual banter will hopefully resume tomorrow (fashionably late album list, blog pound additions, all kinds of pictures). Here's a treat for your eyes until then...Some phenomenal shots of Hong Kong architecture by Michael Wolf.