Currylingus

Thus spoke Cringely from his pulpit:

"The crowd this week in San Francisco at Apple's World Wide Developers Conference seemed mildly excited by the prospect of its favorite computer company turning to Intel processors. The CEO of Adobe asked why it had taken Apple so long to make the switch? Analysts on Wall Street were generally positive, with a couple exceptions. WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE!? Are these people drunk on Flav-r-Ade? Yes. It is the legendary Steve Jobs Reality Distortion Field at work. And this time, what's behind the announcement is so baffling and staggering that it isn't surprising that nobody has yet figured it out until now. Apple and Intel are merging."

Since we're having fun with speculation, here's what I think people will have to say if the merger becomes a reality.

Steve J. - "Ha! Howddaya like THEM Apples, BITCHES!"
Bill G. - "You fruity BASTARD!"
Intel (all of, in chorus) - "Back then hos didn't want me, now I'm hot HOS ALL ON ME!"

Mike Jones (Who?), your bling of wisdom just works on so many levels.